May 30, 2009

Posted by in dating | 0 Comments

A Buffer Zone

I thought this might be useful for those of you that are a bit more shy and find it more difficult to go out and meet people.   It’s written by Jayde Johanssen

A lot of times dates turn out to be pure disasters with both parties biting at the bit to head for their respective cars. The awkwardness and tense pauses that occur can even make people at surrounding tables uncomfortable. Dating can be pretty overwhelming and frustrating with some pain mixed in on occassion. A good bad date story is always a nice addition to any party, but eventually people want to find something more than just a good embarassing story.

Frequenting places like bars and clubs might result in a fair amount of dates, but the quality of them is rather debatable. Once people exit the convenient institutions of college and venture out into the real world, meeting like minded individuals can become much more difficult. This kind of predicament often leads to people dipping their pen in the company ink which is rarely a good idea, work and love lives should be kept very far apart.

There are a whole lot of people in the world so finding a soul mate can take quite a bit of time and effort. Anyone who simply goes for the first person they can tolerate are just short changing themselves and should stick it out for what they really want. The creation of the internet and boom in popularity of dating sites provide a great alternative to the traditional practice of hitting up bars and clubs. These sites also help people who might have become jaded by the dating process and need a little more cushion before fully submerging themselves into the whole idea. People can check out the profiles of other individuals without anyone knowing unless they want to take it to the next level and make contact.

Online dating sites offer people some cushion as they venture into the dating world. People can maintain a certain degree of anonymity when using a dating site since they are able to look at a person’s pictures and profile, learning a little bit about them without having to push through an awkward first conversation just to discover both parties have nothing in common.

After viewing profile after profile they can choose who they are interested in and send them a message. If the other person is interested then they can send a message back and start up a conversation that could potentially lead to something more. If they are not interested they can either send a message with this information or simply not respond. While it might sting a bit initially, this form of rejection is much softer than receiving the blow face to face or even over the phone.

This protected aspect of online dating services is really great for people who err more on the shy side. If a conversation is struck up between two people on a site they can get to know one another a little better before meeting face to face. Exchanging ideas, beliefs, and interests in conversations before actually meeting increases the chances that the first official date will be a success.

Communicating through the internet puts them in a kind of comfort zone where they can open up a bit more without being preoccupied about their appearance or what the other person is thinking. Having a few conversations before a person to person meeting is also a good way to help ensure that the first date will go a bit more smoothly. Being at ease is the perfect way to improve the chances of success and love.

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