Still Single? It’s Not Your Fault!

Would you agree that ultimately why you do whatever you do – whether it is the car or the house you buy, the holiday you go on, the hobbies you take up and the people you chose to be part of your life -are all means to bring you happiness?  What’s the point otherwise, right?

And isn’t being in a loving, happy, fulfilling relationship at the top of that happiness list for you?  No matter how much money you have, how many possessions you own, how much you travel the world, how successful you  – deep down inside you know that the ultimate happiness for you would be to share all that with someone special.

Yet, there’s a worrying theme that is coming through in the conversations I’m having with people.  What I’m realising is that people are finding it hard to reach out for help when it comes to the most important thing in their life – their relationship happiness, because of what they believe it says about themselves.

                “It’s admitting that I’m a loser”

                “It means that something is wrong with me”

                “It’s like saying I’m useless”

So while people don’t mind reaching out to learn how to become wealthier or healthier, they feel that they can’t admit that they need help with their relationships because, for them, it’s like admitting that there is something seriously wrong with them.  But – and I want to shout this out at the top of my lungs – it’s not about YOU!

It’s Not Your Fault!!

My heart is breaking as I hear what people have been telling me about why they don’t reach out for help.  The belief that reaching out for help about your relationships means something is wrong with you is what will keep you stuck.  It means that you will continue to endure bad relationships, ‘better than nothing’ relationships, or no relationships at all.  The utter sad thing is that it doesn’t need to be that way. 

You see, the truth is, it’s not your fault that you keep getting into the same kinds of relationships.  It’s not your fault that your relationships keeping ending up in a similar pattern.  It’s not your fault that you keep attracting the wrong kind of person into your life.

Reaching out for help about your relationships isn’t about WHO you are.  It’s about understanding what’s getting in your way – the blocks, the hurdles, the mis-information and most of all the unconscious ‘stuff’ that is in your programming – and that you have no idea of!  And I mean how can you change what you aren’t aware of? 

You are not broken, useless or a loser.  You are being driven by forces you can’t see. …   Once you discover what’s getting in your way you will know what to do and you will transform your relationship history.

Your first step is to decide that you want to do something NOW to change your relationship story and you’ve got to commit to that goal – without excuses.

It’s easy to think of ‘reasons’ for not deciding and committing to changing what’s been happening with your relationships.   It’s easy to think of the risks, the costs and the challenges of that process.  It’s easy to convince yourself that you don’t need a relationship.  But, if I may be blunt – these are really all excuses and excuses just keep you where you are.

I know from my own experiences.  In that very moment you decide, and commit to a course of action  something in your brain changes.  The risks becaome challenges, the costs become an investment and the challenges become a vehicle of growth. 

The changes I have experienced with my coaches and mentors have happened more quickly and powerfully than I would ever have imagined.  My life is what it is today because of the choices I have made to invest in myself.

So while your lack of success isn’t about you – you can’t change what you don’t know -  your relationship success will be because of you and the investment you make in yourself.

That’s all that really differentiates where we all end up in life –it’s down to the choices we make.  Are your choices taking you closer to what you really want? Or are you allowing your excuses to keep you stuck?

A Special Offer For You

Until now I have been offering FREE Strategy Sessions ($497 value!) to my loyal subscribers of my newsletter. From the conversations I’ve had with them I came to realise what a huge issue there was around the idea of relationship coaching and why it’s so hard for people to reach out.

I realise and appreciate so much more now about how much courage it has taken some people to contact me to request a free strategy sessions, which I’ve been offering as part of the pre-launch to my Get Fit For Love Coaching in September, and I want to acknowledge that.

And I also now want to open up this offer to the faithful readers of my blog. If your intuition, your gut or any part of your being is nudging you because your are seriously ready to step up and do something to change your relationship story then please do contact me for a one hour FRE Strategy Session ($497 value) with me.

Email me:  Susanne@TheSinglesGym.com and just write Strategy Session in the subject line. I’ll get in touch with you and we’ll set up a time to speak. 

 This coaching is only running once this year.  Just think of it, your love life could be totally transformed in time for Christmas and the New Year. 

 Or you could still be where you are now. What do you choose?

Remember your past is absolutely no predictor of your future happiness.  You can take charge of your relationship happiness – but you have to decide that you want to do that and take action.  It’s about investing in you and your ultimate happiness.

Wishing you happiness in life and love,

Susanne

“Changing the world – one relationship at a time”